This past month has been SUCH a blessing to me. It’s so true that He reveals things to us when we least expect them - He teaches us lessons when we aren’t looking for them. I have to admit that some of the lessons were not easy to hear, but necessary to deal with.
Sometimes the most important things are the hardest to hear. So no, it wasn’t easy to hear that I’m selfish and not allowing people to love or see all of me. I feel like I talk about this too much but its definitely something I struggle with. But the question that kept coming up was WHY? Why can’t I open up? Why can’t I be vulnerable? My go to answer was always I want to know how the other person is doing; what’s going on in their life and how can I help them. I thought I was being SELFLESS in doing this, but in reality it’s so SELFISH. People can share with me their struggles and pains in order for me to love them better, but I don’t give them the same opportunity to love me back.
God desires us to be vulnerable and broken and struggling… but why? If we had it together all the time, there would be no need for HIS unbelievable grace. Grace that doesn’t care who you are or what you’ve done; Grace that loves and desires everyone the exact same; Grace that can change hearts. He gives grace because He knows we can’t do it on our own, despite all of our failed attempts. That’s why He sent a Savior… there is no need for us to be our own saviors so we can stop trying.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that as hard as it may be for some of us, let other people around you love you, let them hurt with you, let them rejoice with you, let them carry your burdens for you. For it is this exact act that Christ displays through His grace. When we can learn to be ok with our struggles and ugliness, that’s when He moves the most in us; that’s when His grace is overwhelming.
Its crazy what He has shown me just in the past month alone. Just another reminder of how this is a constant growing and learning process. Is it gonna be easy? Haha, not at all. But is it worth it? Heck yes, eternal life sounds pretty sweet!
“God’s RECKLESS grace is our greatest HOPE” - Tim Keller [The Prodigal God]